Sunday, December 4, 2011

An Excerpt From the Award-Winning Frank, Incense and Muriel by Anne K. Albert

Welcome to the Laramie Mountains, Anne. It's 11 degres and more snow coming down, but there's a crackling fire and a pot of coffee as well as plenty of chai tea. It's  good to have you brave the cold to visit. I've enjoyed your award-winning book and look forward to the next in your Muriel Reeves mystery series.

Thanks for featuring me today, Jean. It’s hard to believe today is Day 10 of the second 2011 "Mystery We Write Blog Tour."

The holiday season is here, which is rather fitting because Frank, Incense and Muriel is set the week before Christmas when the stress of the holidays is enough to frazzle anyone’s nerves. Tensions increase when a friend begs Muriel to team up with a sexy private investigator to find a missing woman. Forced to deal with an embezzler, kidnapper, and femme fatale is bad enough, but add Muriel’s zany yet loveable family to the mix and their desire to win the coveted D-DAY (Death Defying Act of the Year) Award, and the situation can only get worse. This cozy, comedic mystery is recipient of the prestigious 2011 Holt Medallion Award of Merit.

Here’s an excerpt:

“Why are you here, Frankie?”
“My client wants you to help with the investigation.”

“Who’s your client?”
He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. “I’d rather not say until after you make up your mind.”
“Ah. Client confidentiality. I get it. So tell me about Rachel.”
“She didn’t show up for work this morning and my client hopes you’ll be able to shed some light on what happened to her.”
“You knew her.”
So did most of the football team, but I kept that to myself. “Forget Rachel. I’m curious why you’d agree to let me–someone you haven’t seen in fifteen years, as well as a complete novice–work on one of your investigations?”

He fixed me with a level stare but before he could reply, the outside door, that lead from the kitchen to the backyard, swung open.

“You-hoo, Muriel.”
“It’s my Aunt Val,” I explained. “We’re supposed to go to the mall after we drop off her dog at-”
Loud, frantic yowls drowned out the remainder of my sentence. The massive, furry creature galloped toward us. Long legs a blur, its claws scraped the ceramic tile like fingernails on a blackboard. Thick blobs of drool splattered in all directions. I braced myself for the inevitable gooey assault, but the animal bypassed me completely.
Frankie bolted to his feet. “What the–?” 

The dog pinned him against the kitchen counter. Prancing on hind legs with uncontrollable delight, it plastered his snout against Frankie’s crotch. A damp spot spread out from the zipper of his trousers and slowly stretched across his groin.
Oblivious to the confrontation between man and beast, my aunt ambled inside the kitchen, and handed me a round cookie tin. A rosy-cheeked Santa smiled up at me.
I gave the tin a gentle shake and asked, “Day two?”

The dog made yelping sounds. At least I think it was the dog. It was hard to tell with his muzzle embedded beneath Frankie’s thighs.

“You bet,” Val said, referring to her gift. “I made a dozen mincemeat tarts. Each decorated with two of the cutest little ceramic turtledoves you’ve ever seen.” She shrugged off her coat and gloves, and then spun in a circle as she patted her hair. “What do you think?”
I wasn’t certain if neon red curls coated with multiple layers of hairspray until each strand glistened like polished brass suited a short, plump Caucasian woman nearing her sixty-fifth birthday, but I decided to throw caution to the wind. “I like it.”

“Me, too.” With that, she turned her attention to Frankie. “He doesn’t bite, you know.”

“That’s reassuring.” P Placing his hand between his fly and the calico-colored dog, he nudged the animal away. It refused to take the hint, and wedged its nose deeper. The yelping sounds continued.

Yeah. It was the dog. I was sure of it now.
I watched the process repeated three more times. Nudge, nudge. Sniff. Sniff. Yelp. The damp spot on Frankie’s slacks now stretched all the way to his knees. A thick layer of mucous coated his hands. I might have laughed out loud, but I’d been on the receiving end of that goop more times than I cared to recall.
Val strolled over to Frankie. “Hey, Big Boy.”
He grinned. I rolled my eyes.

“That’s the name of the dog,” I told him.

To read more of Frank, Incense and Muriel click here:
Thanks for featuring me, Jean. Before I say adios, I’d like to encourage readers to enter my Comment-to-Win Contest!
CONTEST DETAILS: Three names will be selected at random from comments on all 14 of Anne’s Mystery We Write Blog Tour guest appearances. Winners will receive an e-copy of Frank, Incense and Muriel, and book one of the Muriel Reeves Mysteries. Visit for her schedule and contest details. Good luck!

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Anne K. Albert’s award winning stories chill the spine, warm the heart and soothe the soul…all with a delightful touch of humor. A member of Romance Writers of America, Mystery Writers of America, Sisters in Crime, and married to her high school sweetheart for more than a quarter of a century, it's a given she'd write mystery and romantic suspense. When not writing she loves to travel, visit friends and family, and of course, read using ‘Threegio’ her cherished and much beloved Kindle 3G!


  1. That was an intriguing excerpt, Anne. Thanks for sharing. Looking forward to reading you book.


  2. Loved your excerpt, Anne! Great scene with Big Dog, I was smiling all the way...


  3. It's great to have you join us here today, Anne. There have been over a hundred visitors to the site so far but I fear that most are unable to leave a comment. I'm sure they've enjoyed your novel excerpt.

  4. Love your excerpt, Anne! The persistent Big Boy is a great character!

  5. Thank you, Marilyn. I hope you enjoy it!

  6. Hi Madeline, the strange thing is that in real life I'm frightened of big dogs, but Big Boy just arrived at the door, barged inside and made himself at home. He certainly added to the fun of Frank, Incense and Muriel. How could I not let him stay?!

  7. No worries, Jean. Blogger has it's moments...just like Big Boy!

  8. He certainly is, John. I can't wait to see what he gets into next time.

  9. Thanks for featuring me today, Jean!